The Bitter Twist of Dark 9

It was strange to be back in my own flat. The furniture that Jyrki had destroyed had been replaced and security in this part of the palace had been increased, although not by much. I had spent the afternoon with Shiv clothes shopping, an hour of which had been spent at Cati’s. She had been both stunned and delighted at my predicament. Shocked at the destruction of her creations and pleased that she got replace my entire formal and semi formal dress wardrobe with her latest designs and creations. She had not wanted to redo the same designs as I had before but there were two dresses I begged her for and after considerable whining on my part and a ‘please for the love of peace do as she asks’ look from Shiv she relented. The order was huge and would take her several weeks to complete. But she had promised not only to have a dress ready for the unveiling of the Executor but also to have my favourite dress redone in time for Winter Fete and for that I had hugged her.

After our visit to Cati we had gone to Bam’s hair salon. Bam was horrified when he saw me but in difference to the first time we had met I did not threaten to break his fingers when he played with my hair, I just let him work his magic on it. When we were done for the day, we polished off the afternoon by having afternoon coffee and desert in our favourite café.

As I had expected, Shiv gave me the third degree.

“So what was all that about at Cati’s?” he asked. “You tell her your secrets but not me? I’m hurt, Rim Girl!”

I made a face and stifled a yawn. Cati had asked me how my ‘gentleman’ was and I had blushed enough while answering to raise some eyebrows.

She had grinned and simply said. “Glad to know all is well in your love life, at least.”

Shiv had watched this back and forth with great interest but wisely had kept his mouth shut. Now we were alone in the café he wasn’t so circumspect.

“It’s not a secret to you that I am spending time with him.” I told him.

Shiv had given me the hairy eyeball. “I guess I wasn’t aware of just how close you two were becoming. You usually do a much better job of hiding how you feel.” I had just made a face and he had laughed. “Don’t worry, Rim-Girl, your secret is safe with me. Just don’t advertise it to the rest of the court.” He said. “Your Admiral doesn’t make a lot of friends even if he has the Emperor’s ear and favour. I am quite certain that Rufaan Tigellinus would leap at the chance to have Thrawn disgraced somehow, I would hate to see him use you for that.”

I nodded. “That wasn’t my plan.” I said.

Shiv made a face. “You don’t plan for anything, Merly, that’s your trouble.” He said.

I just sighed. “I know that, but Shiv how does one plan for working for Lord Vader and everything that goes along with it?”

That had made him laugh. “I don’t know.” He said. “It’s a miracle you are still alive!”

“More than you will ever know.” I said quietly.

He just shook his head and the topic moved on to more mundane things.

Once I was back in my flat, surrounded by new furniture and new clothes I wondered about Shiv’s comment on my not planning anything. It was hard enough trying to keep up with Lord Vader and his ever changing schedule let alone trying to sort out my own life. I was grateful to be free of the shoulder torture device. The small sling was a lot easier to deal with and the latest bacta injections had made a huge difference. I used the dermal patches the doctor had given me for the pain and did the exercises Master Kjestyll had given me as home work. My latest check up had shown I was healing well enough which was a good thing because I was certain the doctor was getting tired of seeing me. As I put away my new clothes, I wondered about what was driving Jyrki to do these things to me. Thinking about him led me to think about the Jedi Temple. I had left the box of my treasures at Thrawn’s, under the bed in his spare room. It was the only thing I had not taken back with me when I returned to my flat. I didn’t want the holocrons or Thrawn’s letters to me in a place that wasn’t secure. After putting everything away I sat in the living room with a cup of tea. It was true, I didn’t plan anything. Shiv was right.

Sitting was not the answer and before I gave myself a chance to consider what I was doing I changed into clothes easy to move in, grabbed my satchel and flashlight and was out of my flat. I thought about Shiv’s words as I made my way through the empty hallways to the little library which was quiet. I switched on just the side wall lights and locked the door behind me. The bookshelf that covered the secret passage had not been moved and it took every ounce of my strength and a bit of force push to shift it enough that I could slip behind it through the panel that slid opened when I activated the lock. For the longest time I just stared at the pitch black hole and then taking a deep breath I stepped through it, shutting the panel behind me.

The journey through the tunnel, under the city to the Temple seemed longer this time, probably because I was on my own. There were moments when I could feel panic rise but I fought it. When I reached the other end I breathed a huge sigh of relief. I opened the door and slipped back into the only place my uncle had ever told me to stay away from.

The temple was eerie and silent. I didn’t stop to explore as I made my way back to the main library. I was grateful for my perfect sense of direction. It didn’t take me long to reach the great archive room. I stood in the great hallway and looked around at the endless rows of data, holo books and files. If there were ghosts around then they were staying out of sight.

In the holocron diary my birth mother had mentioned the archives many times. She spoke of the head librarian, Jocasta Nu with a comical mixture of awe and fear. She had also mentioned the data terminals that stored all the indexes and help files. It didn’t take me long to find one and I jumped with fight when it activated under the touch of my hand. For the next hour I spent utterly immersed in learning how to use the antique system. Once I had figured out how the index worked the rest was a lot easier. I wanted to find Jyrki in the system but personal records were under classified files and I had not figured out how to slice through the security. I wasn’t even sure I could. I was able to find a full map of the temple, which surprisingly enough gave a listing of who lived where. My heart leaped in my chest when I saw Akali L’uanna’s name pop up. I memorised how to find her room and then went back to my search for Jyrki. Eventually, I found him but it hadn’t been easy. While he had kept his first name his last name was different. I was glad there had been an image of him as well. There had been no mistaking those blue eyes. He had shared a dorm room with three other boys. I figured out how to get there and without considering anything else, that’s where I went.

The Temple was huge. Next to the Imperial Palace it was the largest building I had ever been in. I could not imagine it during the light of day, filled with people and I was a little sad that I would never know it in this way. Being careful about what I touched, I made my way through the halls and up the stairs to find the dorm room where Jyrki had slept. Many beings had been killed here but there were no bodies. I wondered what had become of them. It had only been twenty three or so years since the massacre here, if the dead had been left where they had been slain, the remains would still be around. Another mystery that would probably never be answered.

The living quarters in the Temple were sparse but spacious. My birth mother had often talked about the lack of possessions that a Jedi owned and it showed in how they had lived. I found the room easily and walked through the door when it opened. I shone the torch and looked around. There were four beds, four dressers, four small desks and one large closet. I took a deep breath and stepped into the room. My heart pounded in my chest but I refused to let my fear to get the best of me. I found my center as I had been taught so many times to do and began to touch the furniture.

The memories were scattered and fractured. I had trouble sorting them out. Pictures of children I didn’t know flashed through my head, laughter and tears echoed in my mind as though they were real.

The third bed was where Jyrki had slept. I don’t know if it was my connection to him or that I was in tune with him but the visions that I saw where powerful and vivid. I sighed when the images released me. I began to open drawers and look through them. His clothes were still there, all that he had owned still sat in the drawers. It reminded me that the people who had lived here had not left willingly; they had been killed quickly and violently. The beds had not been made and it there was s strange sense in the room as though the boys might return at any moment. I pulled out some of the clothes and looked at them. They were small tunics, reminding me that he had been a little boy when all hell had broken loose here. Some of the things I touched gave up memories and some did not. In the space of half an hour I had learned more about Jyrki from his past than I had in all the time I had known him in person.

He had been a quiet, wilful boy. He was not the instigator in some of the pranks that were played but he went along with them. He had not laughed much, even as a small boy and that made me sad but I didn’t know why.

In the small desk drawer I found a lightsaber. I touched it but it did not give up any particular memories. The weapon was generic; Jyrki had not made it he had only used it for practice. I took it out and looked at it. I had seen Lord Vader use his often enough that I knew how to turn it on. The instant hum of the brilliant blue blade gave me a start and I dropped it. The blade vanished instantly. A safety mechanism turned it off the moment I let it go. I picked it up off the floor and studied it closely then tucked it in my satchel. I had not wanted to touch or keep the one my mother had sent to me, but this one was nothing more than a weapon. I thought it might be of use.

I searched further but found nothing else. I guessed that even as small children the Jedi initiates took the rules seriously and did not keep any personal possessions. I was about to turn away when I thought about this for a moment. Maybe Jedi younglings were brought up to believe in no possessions and no attachments but that was not how children were. I sat on the bed for a moment and tried to think where I would hide my precious things if I were forbidden to have them.

I looked under the bed. I looked under the bed’s mattress. I went through the clothes drawers again, emptying them out, looking for false bottoms and hidden compartments. Nothing. I went back to the desk and began to search through it. My fingers found what they were looking for.

The false back on the small bottom drawer had been cleverly designed. The memory showed me Jyrki making it in the quiet hours of the dark. I saw him put it together and the vision showed me how to unlock it. The soft click was rewarding and I pulled the tiny secret box out of its hiding place. It buzzed in my hand and I opened it cautiously.

He had lined this small box with a soft swatch of fabric. Lying in this cloth were two things. One was a simple ring, a man’s wedding band and the other was a pendant. The locket opened up to show a tiny holo-image of a young couple holding a baby and a lock of dark black hair. I wrapped these items up in the small cloth and slipped them in my bag. They had secrets they wanted to give up. I had not touched the wedding band and the locket had not been locked shut. Underneath the cloth at the bottom of the tiny box was a very small holo-transmitter. The kind used to send short messages. I didn’t activate it. I just slipped in long with the other treasures into my satchel.

I tried to put the things I had disturbed back the way I had found them and when I was satisfied that at least on first glance no one would know anyone had been here I left.

I had no idea how much time had passed or how late it was. I wasn’t tired but I was suddenly aware of where I was and what had happened here. The over powering sense of evil that I had felt the last time was not present but a slow sense of unease began to creep into me. A niggling itch between my shoulder blades that made me feel as though I was being observed.

I made my way back into the great library and went to stand in front of the door to the room where uncle Vahlek had found the holocrons from my mother but something whispered through me not to push my luck. With a sigh I made my way back to the safety of the Imperial Palace and my library.

I didn’t bother to move the bookshelf back into place instead I shifted it as much as I could to the right of the passage and then back against the wall. At least this way it looked as though it belonged. When I closed the panel that hid the entrance to the tunnel I was relieved to see it was invisible. I left the library quietly and made my way back to my flat ignoring the sensation of being watched.

I sat down on the couch and emptied the contents of the satchel. It was the holo transmitter I wanted to see. It sat in the palm of my hand and I activated it. The image of an older man appeared.

*** You don’t know me son, but I am your grandfather. I don’t know if this message will reach you or not but I have to hope it does. I have terrible news for you. Your parents are dead. They were killed two days ago when their ship was mistaken for a separatist’s vessel and was shot down by the Republican army. They missed you so very much, Jyrki. Not a day went by where your mother did not think of you, hope for you and pray for you.

You were just a baby when the Jedi came to take you to the Temple. They said you were strong in the force, that one of their people had sensed your powers. Your family did not want to give you up but the Jedi said it was for the best. I will never believe that. I have tried a few times to come and find you but I have not been able to and so I am sending you these things, your parents would have wanted you to have them. The locket was your mothers, it has a hologram of you all together a day after you were born. I took the image and gave her the necklace, a gift to commemorate my daughter’s child. The ring was your father’s wedding band, he had taken it off before the flight because his fingers always got swollen in space and it was in the jewellery box with the locket. I know that you will have no memories of these people but they created you and brought you into the galaxy. They loved you and they were your family.

I have found a man who says he can locate you and get these items to you without raising suspicion. His name is Akosh and you will know him by his white hair. He will know how to get in touch with me should you ever need my help. I am the only living family you have left now and you are mine, I would very much like to hear from you, son. ***

My hand shook. My uncle Vahlek had delivered this message to Jyrki. I tried to think back about all the conversations I had ever had with my uncle about Jyrki. I was certain that I had never asked him if they had met before.

I picked up the locket and clasped it in my hand. There were sharp memories of Jyrki’s grandfather giving to his mother. She wept tears of joy when he had placed it around her neck, but it was the second set of images that really jolted me. It was of my uncle, looking much younger, talking to a very small boy with ice blue eyes, handing him a small package and telling him to keep it very secret. Then my uncle had handed Jyrki something else and had told the small boy that should he ever need help he was to use the tiny transmitter.

“Why are you doing this, sir?” Jyrki had asked.

“I owe your grandfather a favour.” Uncle Vahlek had told him, laying his hand gently upon the boy’s head and then he had vanished leaving Jyrki to ponder the carefully wrapped items he held in his small hand.

I dropped the locket down as though it had stung me. My uncle had known Jyrki and he had said nothing to me about it. Why? I was surprised at how angry I was and with a very deep breath swallowed it down. I picked up the wedding ring and was overwhelmed by memories of a happy marriage. There was nothing special in the information the ring had to share, just that Jyrki looked a lot like his mother but he had his father’s eyes. I knew, as I sat in my living room alone and wound up that I would have to go back into the Temple and find Jyrki’s records, find out where he had come from and who his parents had been. I wondered if his grandfather still lived, though I doubted it. Most of all I wanted to know what uncle Vahlek’s connection to all of this was.

I picked up the lightsaber again and studied it closely. It was an elegant weapon. Not clumsy or awkward like pistols and blasters. It had the feel of a combat stave or sword but with a far more deadly blade. I had watched Lord Vader often enough to know just how deadly a lightsaber was. I sighed and picked up everything I had found, tucked them all away in the small satchel and hid it in my hidey hole in the bedroom. It was very late and I was tired. I got myself ready for bed and was grateful to crawl under the covers. However, instead of falling asleep like I really wanted to, I lay there awake feeling very alone and troubled. Every noise, every creak, every strange sound made me aware that I was sleeping in a flat which had recently been broken into and vandalized by a man intent on hunting me. Pride had made me insist to Thrawn that I would be fine. He had given me a look that I had not been able to decipher but had said nothing. I wanted to live my life in my own place but I was regretting this now. I missed his presence and his warmth next to me and puzzled over how I could have gotten used to that so quickly. I also missed the security that his being there gave me. For the first time in as long as I could remember I was truly scared to sleep in my own bed. I would not make this mistake again.

In the end, after an hour of tossing and turning I got up and fetched the lightsaber out of the satchel from the secret place. Only then, holding it in my hand, under the extra pillow did I fall into a restless, listless sleep. It never occurred to me that this was probably not the smartest move in the universe and that I could have accidentally turned it on while I was sleeping and sliced my head off.