Cloak and Shadows 2

I stood staring out of the small window but I wasn’t actually looking at anything. I had lain in bed in the pleasant enough guest quarters I had been assigned for nearly three hours tossing and turning. Restless and over tired, I just could not sleep. Finally at sometime around two am I had given up, wrapped a robe around my nightdress and gone for a walk. It never occurred to me that wandering around the Admonitor in my night clothes might raise some eyebrows, it was something I was used to doing. Lord Vader often got me out of bed at strange hours with sudden requests for work that urgently needed attending to. Most of the crew of the Executor who inhabited the same part of the ship where I lived and worked were more than used to seeing me hurry along to passageways in my night clothes, bare foot rapidly tying my robe. Me being perfectly dressed was not something Lord Vader placed a high priority on.

There is a place in an ISD where most of the time no one ever goes, that’s quiet and still. It is a small space near the ship’s bow that is rarely used but has a small view port and more importantly silence. I stood staring out of the small window for what seemed an age, breathing in and out as I had been taught by Master Kjestyll. I missed him sorely, his guidance and his presence but he had given me enough tools that I could usually sort this inability to sleep out on my own. Once I felt calm enough I knelt in meditation pose, concentrated on breathing and let my thoughts drift. It was easier to be the stillness when stillness was all around. Unfortunately it didn’t last long.

“Miss Gabriel?” a tentative voice asked.

I sighed and opened my eyes to see a young, somewhat nervous officer standing in the open door way.

“Yes.” I answered without moving.

“Admiral Thrawn requests your presence immediately.” He said.

I looked up at him. “Very well.” I said getting up. “I should get dressed, then.”

“Ma’am, he stressed immediately.” He said.

It was half past two in the morning, standard Coruscant time, I wasn’t going to start an argument, so I followed him in silence as he led me through the ship to Thrawn. He sounded the door chime to the Admiral’s quarters and we stepped inside. Thrawn stood with his back to the door but turned when we entered.

“Miss Gabriel, please come in, sit down.” he spoke politely. “Thank you Mr. Pirri, that will be all.” The young man gave the Admiral a curt nod, turned beautifully on his heel and left, the door closing silently behind him.

I stood, my arms folded across my chest, and stared at the Thrawn. “Well?”

He smiled. “Please, sit.” He gestured to the small living room section of his quarters.

I ignored him. “What is so urgent that it couldn’t wait till I at least got some proper clothes on?”

A smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “As I understand it from your letters, this is proper dress for you much of the time.” He said. “I am glad to see that my favourite robe is getting use.” He waited a few heartbeats and then said for a third time. “Tekari, will you please sit down?”

I gave him a dirty look but did as he asked. “It’s almost three in the morning.” I said glancing at the chrono on the wall, then sitting on the small couch. He sat in the chair adjacent to me.

“Yes it is, which is why I was alerted that you were wandering around. I take it you are having trouble sleeping?” he asked pouring a glass of brandy and handing it to me. He sat back and refilled his glass of mineral water.

“Not joining me?” I asked taking a sip of the brandy and relishing its deep smoky flavour.

“I am on duty, my dear.” He explained. “So what is keeping you up?”

“Strange ship, different engine noise and a bed I am not used to.” I said with a shrug. He arched an eyebrow. I sighed. “And knowing you are here but untouchable doesn’t help.”

“I understand.” He said.

“How did that young man know where to find me?”

“I remembered you telling me about the quietest place on an ISD. If you do not want to be found, sj’iu tekari, you should not share your secrets.” He teased, just a little.

“You should respect my secrets!” I said.

“I do, but when you don’t take your comm with you then I must use all means necessary find you. The last time I let you out of my sight, as I recall, the results were unpleasant. Let us just say I am covering my bases, it would reflect terribly on my record if I lost Lord Vader’s personal assistant a second time.”

I sighed and curled up on the couch, tucking my feet up under me. I hated when he was right. “So, what is on your mind Za’ar?”

“I thought you might want to tell me about your adventures with the Bounty Hunter.” He said lightly.

“At ten to three in the morning?”

“You are awake, and right now nothing else demands my attention.” He countered.

I grinned. “You mean I have aroused your curiosity concerning my knowledge about Fett and his armour.” I said. “If I didn’t know you better I’d say you were jealous.”

He made a face. “Chiss do not believe in jealousy.” He said a tad more sharply than he meant to and I felt the hint of untruth under his words. It made me smile.

“Well, you have nothing to worry about with me.” I said.

“I do not worry about you in that respect.” He said and then added quietly. “ButI do miss you.”

I looked up at him in surprise. His last statement had been unexpected. I had no idea how to respond to it without getting sentimental so I just nodded, sighed and sipped my drink; slowly the knots in my shoulders and the tension that had kept me awake began to ease up.

“Your uncle is a most intelligent and interesting man. I was glad to make his acquaintance.” He said changing the subject. “I can see why you adore him so much.”

I laughed. “He said almost the exact same thing about you.”

That earned me a raised eyebrow. “Really, I was under the impression he did not approve of me and my relationship with you.”

I smiled slightly and repeated my uncle’s words exactly to Thrawn who nodded. “He is right in all he says.”

“It’s a bit late to go back to just flirting now.” I told him tartly.

He came to sit by my side. “I did not mean it that way.” He said gently.

I sighed and made a face. “It’s late, I’m tired and I can’t sleep. It is absolute hell being so close to you and having to be so formal all the time, so if you have a point will you please make it?”

He caressed the side of my face gently and nodded. “Tell me how you knew about that little trick with the Mandalore armour.” He coaxed. I was too tired to resist.

I stared at my brandy as I swirled it about in the glass. Its fumes combined with the scent of the man sitting near me made me sad, made me homesick, but I wasn’t certain exactly what home it was I was sickening for. I looked up at his face.

“If I add ‘please’ will you indulge me?” He asked.

I drew a very slow deep breath. I wasn’t sure where to even begin. It had happened such a long time ago. I had known who Boba Fett was for most of my life, once my father had taken over the docking bay. The first time he had shown up it had caused great panic. He wasn’t known for his happy personality but he and my father had established a good working relationship. He would show up, every now and then, needing some serious work done on his ship, repairs he could not fix himself. He would be polite and to the point. He told the mechanics working with him on his ship exactly what he wanted and often how to do it. At first he was a fascination for me, his face always covered by his helmet and I was as curious as a jax so I would follow him around and ask him all manner of questions which he mostly ignored until my father, apologetic, would haul me away. Fett had fascinated my child mind and imagination. He became one of my father’s customers that I adored.

Once I had started working and learning the mechanic’s trade I also began to work on his ship when he would occasionally show up, usually trailing after Jyrki because he was the head mechanic at the bay and I was the student. By then I wasn’t really interested in Fett any more, it was Jyrki who held me in sway. This did not go unnoticed by the bounty hunter who had found it all very amusing.

I stopped for a moment, lost in these memories, to sip at my brandy. If I closed my eyes I could see him in his armour as clearly as if he were standing next to me. I could smell the engine oils and dusty air of the docking bay and feel the heat and weight of Fett’s unseen gaze. I smiled.

Thrawn watched me carefully. “So you have known this bounty hunter almost your whole life?” he asked breaking into my memories.

I nodded. “Odd really I never thought about it that way before, but yes I suppose you are right. Although on Tatooine that isn’t so hard to believe, I mean Fett works for Jabba the Hutt a lot and my father’s docking bay has a really good reputation, people trust him. A lot of people use his services. Fett has known me since I was a very little girl.”

“What happened next?” He asked.

I sighed.

Next had been Jyrki and all that glorious mess, the arguments with my father, the desperate desire for change, for escape from the horrible disaster of a teenaged broken heart. I did not see Fett next until after I had left home and started dancing at Jabba’s palace. I told Thrawn about how Fett had come to my rescue and what he had said and done. The description of my lesson in head butting had made Thrawn smile. It was after that incident and shortly before I got out of the palace job when I got the chance to repay Fett’s gesture. I had been dancing the late shift. The very late shift so that by the time I was done, the last of the drunks, Jabba’s courtiers and the party goers had fallen into a coma on the main audience room floor, meaning that I could go to my room and rest. I had hated dancing the late shift, it was the worst but because I was the newest hire I got stuck with it often.

It was quiet as I made my way through the labyrinth of corridors to the out of the way quarters set aside for people like me. At that hour of the morning nothing in the palace moved except the B’omarr monks, so the last thing I was expecting was to be grabbed when I walked into my room. One hand had clamped over my mouth and the other grabbed my arm, making sure I didn’t struggle.

“I won’t harm you, so don’t scream. I just need your help.” I knew the voice and had nodded.

He let me go and I turned around to see Boba Fett, he had slumped slightly and was holding his side.

“You’re hurt?” I had asked.

“Yes and I can’t get to the wound. No one here must see me this way.” He had growled.

I had nodded and then I had shut and locked the door. “I understand. Tell me what you need me to do.”

And that is what he did. I helped him take off his helmet and he instructed me on how to undo the armour and the liner shirt. The twist in the joiner straps frustrated me and he had tried not to laugh as I swore because laughing hurt him. He was patient as he explained their trick and although he made no sound, I know it had hurt to move as I helped strip off the shirt which was actually part of the armour he wore. There was a nasty scorch in the fabric and across his back, under his shoulder blade, was a terrible looking burn. He had brought with him a med kit and he walked me through what needed to be done. I didn’t have a lot of experience at playing nurse. While I washed the nasty looking wound he had explained to me why he wore his armour that way.

“My father taught me this trick. There was a time when it was popular, even fashionable to steal Mandalore armour. He found out that by twisting the joiner straps this way it was virtually impossible for someone to undo without serious co-operation from the wearer.” He had explained. “Not many know about it.”

“I thought this armour made you virtually invincible?” I had said as I finished up cleaning the wound.

He had nodded. “It does, but there are some weapons that can penetrate the liner material and the duraplast doesn’t cover everything. It was a lucky shot with a powerful weapon.” He had winced slightly as I applied a bacta salve.

“Sorry, I am not a medic and I’m not very good at this.” My hands had trembled as I had bandaged his wound.

“You are doing just fine.” He had said and had tried to get up but failed. For the first time I had looked carefully at his face. He was very pale and exhausted. I knew enough to understand that he had to rest.

“How long…?”

“Three days.” He had said. “Out on the Rishi Maze, I ran into some unexpected trouble. Will be paying a visit to your father tomorrow to get some parts for Slave I”

“You need to lie down, rest a bit or you won’t be able to do anything or go anywhere.”

He had shaken his head and argued with me, but he was in a great deal of pain and I had sedatives. I had pressed the hypo-spray to his neck before he could stop me and then realised how stupid that was, because he was heavy and dragging him to the bed was a difficult procedure. With a lot of work, I got him on the bed lying face down so that his back had a chance to heal. He was naked from the waist up and I had never seen a body with so many scars on it.

I had watched him for a few moments to be sure he really was sedated and then I had showered and changed out of my dance costume. Once I had cleaned up the mess of bloody rags and bandage material, I had sat by the bed and watched Fett sleep. It wasn’t the first time I had seen him without his helmet but it was the first time I had ever seen him utterly relaxed. Without the bitter, hard look he carried with him at all times, he was a handsome man after a fashion. I had wondered about his past then, where he had been born, who his family had been but I knew that he would never talk about such personal things, even with me, someone he trusted enough to come to when he needed help. I know I dozed a little but never fully slept. It was the first time I had ever seen someone badly injured, let alone had to help them. I didn’t want him to up and die on me. In the morning I had slipped out for food, locking the door. When I came back Fett was awake and sitting up.

“How do you feel?” I had asked offering him the food and tea.

“Like hell, but I will live to fight another day.” He had said. “You have my gratitude.”

“Well, I think we are even.” I had said shyly. “But why come to me? I mean a medic would have been better and maybe even closer.”

“I knew I could trust you to keep word and keep your mouth shut.” He had said simply.

I had just stared at him then. I had adored him since childhood. Hearing that he trusted me was like being given the keys to the galaxy. I had nodded shyly and smiled. I didn’t know what to say so I just said ‘thank you’.

He had merely inclined his head, finished his food and after a time in the ‘fresher, with my help, he got dressed.

He had stopped before putting his helmet on, before leaving to give me a stern look, lifting my chin with two fingers, the way he often did with Rystáll, one of the other dancers he spoke with on and off. “Get out of this place, Merlyn. You don’t belong here.” There was a hint of threat mingled with sadness in his words and while it had not been the first time he had said them to me, I suspected it would be the last. It had not occurred to me then that he had known me since I was a small child, in some ways, from a distance at least had watched me grow up. He had been a part of my life but I had also, in some strange peripheral way, been a part of his and I had never really noticed or considered that at all. Thinking about it now made me terribly sad but also grateful. Fett had not said anything else but had given me a nod of his head as he left.

I sat back and watched Thrawn’s face carefully, while sipping my brandy. “I smartened up and quit working at the palace after that. I suppose part of me felt I owed it to him and I also felt I was pushing my luck. I saw him once more, briefly at the Docking bay. We didn’t speak to each other but he had given me that nod which told me everything I needed to know. That ‘we share a secret’ sort of nod. I never spoke of this incident to anyone ever and you are the only person who knows about it.” I said. “I hope it stays that way.”

He nodded. “You have my word it will.” He reached over and stroked that annoying lock of hair from my face. “You get yourself into the strangest situations. Most people would have been terrified of even being in the same room with a bounty hunter of his reputation.”

I shrugged. “People feel the same way about Lord Vader. I think it is just what you are used to, you know? And maybe I am not so easily scared by some of the rougher side of the Galaxy, growing up in a place like Mos Eisley has to be good for some things. Plus he was known to me. He’d never done me any harm; in fact he had saved my neck. It never occurred to me to be scared.” I yawned. “Now it’s your turn. You did promise that this was an exchange of information.”

“It’s just past four in the morning.” He spoke gently.

I shook my head. “Uh uh, no deal.”

He smiled, caressing my cheek with the backs of his fingers. “You need to sleep; you are fighting it as we speak. If I start to tell you any story you will crash in the middle of it and I shall be forced to repeat myself and you know how much Chiss loath to repeat themselves.”

I gave him a cross look. “No. You said an information swap not a one sided no trade affair!”

“I will be asking you for your help in about four or so hours from now, to sort out the details on that Mandalorian armour. I need you awake and aware for that. I promise I’ll tell you what you want to know then.” He said.

I fought back on another yawn. He was right, as usual, which annoyed me to no end. He knew he had won when I drained the last of the brandy from my glass and got up. No matter how tired I was I knew that falling asleep on his little couch would be neither appropriate nor comfortable. Sharing his bed here was out of the question.

He stood up with me and cupped my face in his hands. “You are not the only one who finds this situation frustrating, my dear.” He said softly. His hands were warm and I closed my eyes. His sudden kiss was gentle, at first, but it soon became breathtakingly intense. I ached for him with such a longing I thought I would shatter from it. It was heart breaking. I opened myself up to this and sent the sensation back to him. I felt him respond as he pulled me closer; the kiss which had begun tender and careful became possessive and more aggressive. I thought if one could die from drowning in the sensations that kissing stirred up, then this was a mighty fine way to go. He was extraordinarily good at kissing me and I didn’t want it to end but I pulled away from him anyway, even though he fought to keep me close.

“Please don’t.” I shook my head, both hands pushing against his chest. “I am barely hanging on to my self control as it is. This won’t help. All this does is make me want more, which I can’t have, can I?” He shook his head so I continued. “And before you give me the devotion to duty and how would it look to the men under me lecture, just let me say I do understand, I just don’t like it very much. I didn’t think it would be so difficult to be in this situation.”

He looked at me for a moment then nodded. “We are such creatures of appetite.” He said softly, his voice had gone husky. “Sometimes even with the best of intentions it still rules us.” He was fighting his own battle with the lust and desire he felt. We stepped back from each other, taking a moment to catch our breath, to come back to our senses.

“Whatever.” I told him crossly as I headed for the door. “This bites bantha butts, you know that? I have no idea what I am doing here and apparently neither do you.” It was easier to be angry with him, with the situation than it was to want him as badly as I did. He made thinking clearly impossible.

“You are here because I requested it. I knew you had knowledge about certain bounty hunters and I thought you might be helpful, and as it turns out I was right.” He said retreating to the cool, alien reserve he so often hid behind.

“Is that all? Because I could have told you all this stuff via HoloNet transmission.”

He shook his head. “No, even the most secure transmissions can be sliced. This needed to be kept quiet. And I wanted it delivered personally by you.”

“More bloody secrets!” I snapped ignoring the backhanded compliment.

“I am helping Lord Vader, it will make him happy.”

“Nothing makes him happy! He’s never happy!” I was now officially cranky.

Thrawn just chuckled, following me to the door. “Now you are just being difficult. Go to bed. We have serious work to do in a short period of time. I need you rested not argumentative.”

“You like me argumentative!” I replied.

He smiled. It made me shiver. “Only when we have time to play, my dear.” He said, caressing the side of my face, toying with my hair. Now he was just being mean.

I shook my head, backed away from him and did the smartest thing I could, I opened the door and got out of there as fast as possible. It was beyond me how he could whet my desire and make me cross both at the very same time. I stormed back to my quarters, burning my fury and frustration out along the way. I was well and truly exhausted by the time I cleaned my teeth and tumbled into the bed. Sleep found me almost before my head hit the pillow unfortunately it didn’t last nearly long enough.