The Wrong Side of Right 9

The room, although huge felt claustrophobic to me. I shivered. I knew or felt that Lord Vader had been here recently. I opened up my senses and searched for him but all that lingered was a vague ripple of his presence along with someone else and nothing more. I took a deep, steadying breath and walked from the turbo lift to where the stairs which led up to where the Emperor was seated. His throne was very much like the one he had in the Imperial palace and it seemed to swallow him whole.

“Yes, my apprentice was here, child. I see your talents are growing stronger.” He murmured but his voice sounded too loud in the darkness. I tried to shut out the sensation of spiders crawling across my brain but I couldn’t. He was far too powerful for that. I shivered and surrendered to his force touch. When I reached the bottom of the steps I genuflected and bowed my head, waiting for his permission to move, to look up. I felt rather than saw his smile. He let me wait for what seemed a very long time before he told me to rise.

“You wished to see me your Excellency?” I asked as I stood, my voice sounded small and child like in the vast room.

“Yes.” He said. “So tell me, what do you think of this new battle station?”

I shifted my stance and placed my hands behind my back. “It’s very … big, your Highness.”

He laughed. He actually threw back his head and laughed. I shuddered. “Yes, child it is, but that is merely a description of how it looks, I asked you what you thought of it.”

“I don’t know what to think.” I told him quietly. “It’s designed for massive amounts of destruction. It could annihilate a planet in the blink of an eye. It scares me to death. That’s how I feel about it.” I was angry without any real reason. This room, this place was making me edgy and nervous.

“And so it should, child.” He said satisfied. “Come, I wish you to see this.” His hand waved at me to come forward. As if pulled by some invisible rope I climbed the steps until I was standing near him, near the throne.

“Look out of the window what do you see?” He asked, waving his hand vaguely in the direction of the large viewport.

I did as he asked. “The fleet, stars…space.” I said. “But people are going to die out there aren’t they?”

He nodded and sat back against the throne, melding once more into the shadows. “You have witnessed space battles before have you not?” He asked.

I turned to look at him, the cowl of his cloak hid most of his face but his eyes seemed to glow with a light of their own. They frightened me. “I have, Excellency.”

“And you feel them do you not? You feel the deaths?”

I swallowed and nodded.

“Lord Vader should have taken better care with you.” He said softly, “For that matter, perhaps so should I. You have many talents you have kept well hidden from us, from me.”

I looked away. I wondered how much deeper he would dig into my soul. You have a strong, stubborn will which amuses my master but make no mistake you will be broken and then you will be his obedient and compliant servant. And what is more, you will be powerless to stop it from happening. Lord Vader’s words echoed through my mind. I wondered what it was the Emperor wanted of me but now I was scared to ask. I used the quiet moments to find my center, to breathe and find strength.

“Come closer child.” He beckoned. I did as he asked and came to stand before him.

“Sit.” He said, motioning to the space on the floor at his feet.

I moved as though in a dream, doing as he commanded without thinking about it. I sank to the cold stone floor, one knee tucked under the other which was pressed close to my chest. Without even realising it I was echoing the position of the little statue he had allowed me to see. I watched as he pushed a button on the armrest of his throne, a small compartment opened up and he withdrew something from it. In the dim light I saw the glint of silver, a slender cylindrical object. I knew what it was right away and I looked up at him puzzled, I had already read a lightsaber for him once and I couldn’t tell if this was the same one as before.

“You did so well with the last one Lord Vader brought me…,” The Emperor purred as his fingertips caressed the lightsaber as though he were stroking a kitten, “I thought I would share this one with you as well.”

I could feel my pulse quicken and the knot in my gut tighten as fear shot through me. I knew without asking what he wanted just as I knew this was not the same weapon he had handed me after Bespin on Wayland, deep in the mountain complex. I held my breath without realising it. When he leaned forward to hand it to me, I hesitated, shrinking back from him. Out of the corner of my eye I caught a flash of red, a Royal Guardsman had shifted ever so slightly ready to make certain that I obeyed. Palpatine made an almost imperceptible gesture with his free hand and the guard sank back into the shadows.

“The young lady knows her place; she will do as she is told.” The Emperor said in a quiet voice as hard as durasteel.

I shut my eyes tightly for a second, drew a deep breath then looked up into his face. I had been trained to get past this fear, Master Kjestyll’s words echoed in my head almost as if he were at my side. I gave a slight nod and the Emperor’s eyes seemed to glow. I did not like what I saw in the expression on his face, glee, satisfaction, and triumph. It reminded me so sharply of Venthan Chassu’s last painting that I had to look twice at the throne to make sure it was not made from bones.

“No disobedience, child. You work for me.” His reprimand was sharp edged and left a bitter taste in my mouth.

When I reached out to him my fingers were trembling visibly. With a soft chuckle he placed the weapon into my outstretched hand.

“Tell me what you see,” He commanded, “As you see it. I know you can do this now. Do not hold anything back as you did the last time.”

I bit my lip. How he had known I had not spoken of every detail was beyond me. I was certain the Emperor could not read minds but he always seemed to know, his ability to read people was uncanny. I nodded and held the lightsaber in both hands tightly, opening myself up to its memories.

At first I wasn’t sure what to think. These memories were new, just like the weapon. I watched them unfold, like the way Thrawn undressed me, slowly, carefully, bit by bit. I watched as Luke put the weapon together, and then as he tried it out, feeling his trepidation then triumph and relief. I saw as he made his plans to get back his friend, to rescue Han Solo, slipping the weapon into the little R2 unit. The memories jolt forward to a battle on Jabba’s sail barge. Jumbled, chaotic. I saw flashes of imagery, Boba Fett falling into the pit of Carkoon. I know I gasped out loud. Boba Fett was part of my life and being fed to the Sarlacc was one of Jabba’s favourite punishments but Fett’s fall was an accident. I gasped for breath as the fight continued until the sail barge was destroyed taking Jabba with it. After that were only snippets, faces and a space journey to a planet I had never seen before. There was a terrible sense of sorrow then. Luke had lost someone he had loved and admired but I couldn’t tell who it was. I could feel the tears rolling down my cheeks as I spoke of what I was seeing out loud to the Emperor. He was right, I had learned some measure of control and despite the overwhelming sensations that accompanied the memories I could describe them almost as they unfolded in my mind. It was like describing a holo-drama to a blind man.

I saw the journey to Endor, vague flashes mostly of fear of getting caught, worry about his friends. Something in Luke had changed from brash young boy to thoughtful young man, bound and determined to right a wrong. He knew that Lord Vader was his father and had accepted it, more or less. He had also known that Lord Vader had sensed his presence. I’m endangering the mission, he had said, I shouldn’t have come… but he had come anyway because he believed he could turn his father back towards the light, that somewhere deep inside Lord Vader’s soul there was still good, and because it was his destiny which he could no more back away from it than I could let go of his lightsaber. I took a breath and gathered my thoughts trying to sort out the jumble in my mind. What happened next was confusing, small furry creatures, the Ewoks, had taken them hostage. The images were unclear because Luke’s own mind had been on something else, something more serious, more frightening, confronting Darth Vader. I felt it, the moment Luke decided to give himself up and perhaps save his friends. His naïveté and his arrogance were astonishing to me. Even as I said this out loud I heard the Emperor’s soft reply.

“That was the failing of all the Jedi.” He said. “What else do you see?”

Lord Vader had known. He had felt Luke’s presence and there had been no surprise when the young man had shown up, turning himself into the guard at the Alpha base on the Sanctuary Moon. For the first time Father and son faced each other in a quiet sort of calm. When the guard had handed Lord Vader Luke’s lightsaber I felt the flash of pride as sharply as though I had been struck across the face. Your skills are complete, you are as powerful as the Emperor has foreseen… Lord Vader had said when he had ignited the weapon. It shone with a brilliant green light. For a moment the two men regarded one another, Luke looking for the good in the man he stood before, the father he had never known but had yearned for and Lord Vader contemplating the past, watching, his own emotions in turmoil, as the guards had taken Luke away for the final confrontation. Dawn was slowly beginning to break. For a few moments Lord Vader was torn and then he moved, ready to present his son to the Emperor on the Death Star. His loyalties decided, his path chosen, his downfall complete.

I sat on the floor, my breathing coming to me in short gasps, the lightsaber still clasped in both of my hands. I looked up at the Emperor to tell him I was done when suddenly a new set of memories flashed through me making me whimper. Lord Vader had passed Luke’s weapon to the Emperor. I had not expected to see this and what came next shook me to the core. I did not speak the memories that came to me, short and crystal clear. When they were finished I trembled violently but not out of fear, out of anger.

I scrambled to my feet suddenly. I felt the Royal Guardsmen move, a subtle shift in stance. I had a weapon in my hands and I was unpredictable. The Emperor laughed softly. He knew exactly what I had seen; he knew because this was what he had truly wanted me to see. I backed away from him, my knuckles white from gripping Luke’s lightsaber so hard.

“Yes.” He said, nodding. The word came out as a long slow hissing caress.

“How could you?” I asked so quietly I wasn’t sure I had spoken the words out loud.

“It is the way of things, young Merlyn, surely you must understand that.” He explained to me the way a father would explain to a small child that fire burns.

“You can’t…! Not after all he has done for you; after all you have done to him!” I shouted. The guards behind me tensed, shifted their stance and readied their weapons.

The Emperor laughed. “Anakin Skywalker would have been the most powerful sith in the galaxy had he not let his pride, his fury better him. He lost power when he lost his limbs, he is imperfect.” Palpatine hissed, leaning forward to emphasise his words. “His son is stronger, almost whole and primed to take his father’s place. Lord Vader knows this to be true.”

That was a lie. Lord Vader did not expect this betrayal. Lord Vader thought the object of this game was to turn Luke so that he might serve them both. Vader had no idea that the Emperor was planning to replace him.

“No!” I screamed defiant, angry. This was so unfair that I had no words to express what I felt.

Palpatine sat back in his throne and laughed. “Now you see the way of things, little one. Oh I have such plans for you.” His voice was a sigh, “Your talents make you valuable, your gift of psychometry is so rare. Honed to perfection, what a weapon you will be, reader of things, keeper of secrets….”

“I will never work for you, ever!” I spat out defiantly.

The Emperor chuckled softly. “Oh I think that you will. I think that you would not want to see your adoptive family hurt because you refuse to do as I ask.”

I narrowed my eyes at him. “You leave my family alone they have done nothing to you!”

His hand waved in a dismissive manner. “On the contrary my dear, shall I reveal your father’s controversial smuggler’s past to you? Tell you of some of his less appealing qualities? He should have been arrested and executed long ago for the crimes he has committed and continues to commit against this Empire. And do not think I do not know about the Tze’yusha’Jin Akosh, his actions during the clone wars alone merit my wrath. If you wish to protect them you will serve me.”

“So you use my love for my family just as you used Vader’s love for Padmé.” My voice was low and cold. Hatred for this man who sat before me coursed through my veins.

“Vader’s passion made him easily pliable but he has become old, useless to me. He defies me to suit his own needs. His son will replace him as my apprentice and stand at my side as I bring order to this galaxy and crush this ridiculous rebellion once and for all! You will comply because you do not wish to see the people you care for hurt. You are not quite as easily manipulated as I had hoped but I do believe you can be coerced and perhaps this will actually have the desired effect.” His words were a snarl competing with my anger which buzzed in my brain like angry hornets. I saw his hand twitch and felt the Guardsman closest to me move. “You may go now, we will speak later. I have much for you to do and you have much to learn about being in my service, girl, first of all, obedience and compliance. I shall enjoy watching you take these lessons to heart.”

I didn’t think then, I simply acted out of rage, out of desperation and whirled about igniting the weapon in my hand. Green flashed through the air as I swung out at the guardsman behind me but before I could even strike the lightsaber was swept from my hands by Palpatine’s force pull. His laughter filled the room.

“Yes, your anger is a powerful thing. How your Jedi mother would weep to see her daughter turning to the dark side. In time you will make a fine addition to my stable, but not yet, I think. You still have too much defiance but we will break you of that when the time is right….” He told me, patting the weapon he now held in his hands.

I was so angry I was shaking. Somewhere inside of my head a voice I knew from dreams was shouting at me to calm down, to think but I ignored it. Fury raged through me, a blinding storm of terrible emotion that would eat my soul whole if I let it. “I hate you.” I hissed and I meant it.

“Yes, I know,” He replied almost tenderly, “And I will use that emotion wisely, I can assure you.”

“He will never forgive you for this.” I hissed through clenched teeth. Neither will I, I thought.

“His forgiveness is not sought nor will it matter. He will be dead and I will have a new apprentice at my side, a more powerful apprentice.” He replied softly.

Bereft of words I simply shook my head slowly. I had not expected this; I had not thought him capable of such betrayal. As deeply as I loathed him in that moment a tiny part of me deep inside sensed he was wrong but I was too stunned, too angry to voice it. He just smiled at me then, almost lovingly, the way a master will smile at a trained pet which has finally learnt the lesson being taught.

“Escort Miss Gabriel to her shuttle, see that she arrives safely at the beta landing pad. She is of value to me, keep her from harm… until it is over.” Palpatine said as two uniformed guards stepped out of the shadows. They both gave curt precise military bows and the Royal Guard who had come up behind me gasped my arm tightly.

I have never liked being taken by force and the Royal Guard’s touch shoved me over the edge. I struggled wildly, screaming at the Emperor, berating him for what he was about to do, hating him for the betrayal of Lord Vader, hating him for what I knew he wanted to do to me. I was beside myself with fury and utterly out of control. I wondered briefly if this is what it felt like to go mad. Somewhere in the bottom of the darkness a gentle voice pleaded with me to find calm, to back down and while part of me ignored this voice another part listened. Slowly I came back to some semblance of sanity. The Guardsman who held me was very strong and I could feel his fingers digging into the flesh of my arm but the pain helped to clear my head. No matter how hard I struggled I knew I didn’t stand a chance against these men or the Emperor and there was nothing I could to do prevent what came next but it didn’t stop me from railing against it.

I was all but dragged to a second turbo lift, struggling all the way. I could feel Lord Vader’s presence so close it was as if he were standing next to me but I could not reach out to him with the force, there was something blocking me, he was shutting me out. It’s a trap! I screamed at him with my mind but my mental warning fell on deaf ears. In the scope of his world I was no longer important, all that mattered to Lord Vader was turning his son and pleasing his Master. For the first time in a very long time I felt very small and very alone. It was only the vague hint of Qui Gon Jinn’s ghostly presence in my mind that brought me back from the brink of utter despair. I stopped struggling then and the Guardsman released my arm when we reached the docking bay where my shuttle was.

The two officers followed me onto the Sigiri. I was shoved into the co pilot’s chair, a blaster held tightly to my head by the shorter of the two men while the other piloted the shuttle off the Battle Station to the beta site on the Endor moon. Neither of them spoke a word to me. I could feel their disdain and dislike of me coming off in waves. Had it not been for the Emperor’s words to take care that I was not harmed, I wasn’t at all certain what else they would have done to me. I had seen looks like they gave me before and it made my skin crawl. As it was they did nothing except maintain guard. The trip took no more than thirty minutes and in that time I had formulated my plan. I drew a deep shuddering breath and began the process of calming down to find my center. Be the stillness you seek…. I would need all of my wits about me if what I wanted to do when we landed was going to work.